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About Deviant Artist Alex StewartMale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 11 Years
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Statistics 93 Deviations 270 Comments 2,872 Pageviews

Newest Deviations

The Truth -I Want To Know-
I want to feel, I want to be.
I want to know what I'm looking for.
But I don't know, maybe I'm asking
For too much, maybe more.
When you say those three words,
Do you mean them? Are they true?
Because I know one thing…
I really do love you.
So tell me, am I broken?
For feeling just like this?
I want to make the pain take leave.
So lend me one more kiss.
I can't take it anymore.
For you haven't shown me it's real.
Is it true? Do you mean it?
How do you TRULY feel?
A thousand fiery dragons burn
Inside my pit of a soul.
I want to know, I want, I want…
The longing's getting old.
I know it's too much to ask for,
To be loved as such and more.
But I've never felt like I'm truly loved.
Please show me what life's for.
I need this love. Can't take it anymore.,
These feelings truly hurt.
Because deep down inside my heart,
I feel like shit and dirt.
So tell me please,
I'm screaming to above.
I just want to know how you really feel…
I just want to be loved...
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 1 3
The Burning Inside
My insides are burning, black and dead
From the smoke that lies within.
Blocking out the real world,
And all the lies it brings.
I can't breathe in these lies
The one's I've tasted way too long.
These lies are taking me in flames.
Tell me where did I go wrong?
I want to breathe the cleansing air
That seeps within my heart.
But the hate keeps clouding up my mind.
It's ripping me apart.
Sometimes I think I'm the one wrong.
And then I open my eyes.
I see it's you that's lied to me,
And I'm burning, wasted, blind.
And as I see the truth, my love,
I'll stop to say goodbye.
For I loved you truly, with all my heart,
And the pain will not subside.
So farewell, my queen, my hope, my heart
I've lost what I'm looking for.
I realize I'm guarded and dead
To this world, I'm nothing more.
I hate to say I give up,
Hate to say I'm gone.
But I truly can't take it anymore.
This love is sadly wrong.
So here I leave you open to
This sad, sad new truth.
But never doubt, for just one moment,
That I never
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 0 0
Let Me Know
I wake up to an empty home
I walk outside, and there's no one on
The streets.
And I don't know why
I feel so alone
Turn on the news, there's nothing there.
Just a lonely black screen into which I am staring
Why does it feel so cold?
Am I the only one here?
Let me know I'm not alone.
Give me a shoulder to lean on.
Let me know that you're still there,
And you still care
Just let me know
As much as I hate to admit it,
It seems like I'm all by myself
Is all of this my fault?
Was it something I did wrong?
Let me know why I'm so alone
Why is there no one to care?
Let me know why no one's here
To comfort me,
To let me know
I'm not alone.
Am I meant to be this way
Just tell me why?
Am I meant to be alone?
Let me know why this world's so cold.
Let me know why I can't breathe
Let me know why I can't seem to be
Anywhere but here...
Just let me know
Just let me know
Just let me know
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 0 0
Happiness is something
That doesn't come easy to people.
Some can breathe it in,
And bask in its glory.
But I others struggle
With the dreams of this emotion.
Every little taste of happiness
That comes into a man's life
Is cherished,
And never forgotten
For the littlest bit of happiness
Drowns all despair of the past.
So seek this emotion, not, my friends.
It shall not come to those who look.
For true happiness is the kind that smiles at us
As we walk past while walking through the snow of agony.
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 0 0
My World Is A Cigarette
My world is a cigarette
Being smoked by the ones around me.
No one can control the ashes of my past,
And no one can breathe in the smoke
Of my future.
As the flame slowly licks
The things happening around me,
My being shrivels
Into a wad of burned memories.
Put my soul to the paper,
And my blood to the fire
And smoke my mind away
With one
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 0 0
The Elovetric Chair
When they took you to that room,
And opened up the doors,
They strapped you down to the electric chair, and yet,
You begged for more.
Your silent screams are heard so loud
As they sit and watch you die.
Then suddenly, silence fills the room,
And your eyes roll to the sky.
You had been convicted,
Of a crime you did commit.
All you did was love someone,
But society comlpletely shunned it.
Even when you say it's love,
And have to pay the price,
They don't feel, so you don't feel.
So then, it can't be right.
You died that day, in that chair of pain,
Your eyes seemed full of rotten tears.
But you were the only one who had loved,
All throughout those cruel years.
So if love is a crime, strap me down,
And I'll pull you right beside me.
Becuase we are all victims in this cruel world,
Of love, the thing which guides me.
So when I die becauseof this,
This sin I can't commit,
I'll thank the Lord for everything,
Because this sin was so, so sweet.
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 0 4
There's something that you need to know...
I tell you every day....
But even so, I want again,
To let the words come out to you...
I'd give you the world and everything in it
To just hold you once again.
Some people don't believe
That my love for you is real...
But I guarantee, with all my heart,
We were meant to be...
There are some things this world can't change,
And you and i are one.
And the world might change,
ANd be destroyed,
But my love your you will go on
So please, take my hand...
I want to hold you close....
Close to my heart, close to my soul...
To whisper in your ear,
"I love you..."
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 2 4
There's nothing there, nothing between us,
You once were strong,
But now you cannot hold.
There's something wrong,
Something I can't explain...
I wish you the best in your robot ways.
I'll wind you up, so you can march
Right along with all the others...
Just go with them, you're all the same,
So try hard not to let your nightmares show.
You can't be real...
You're a plastic person
Just like they programmed you to be.
You're cold and lifeless,
Like a robot should be...
No blood flows in your cold, metal veins....
So goodbye! I've had enough of you...
Goodbye! I can't take anymore.
Goodbye! Anywehre you go...
Just remember me...
The one who you wound up
To march with the other plastic men...
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 1 6
There's no time to look
And see just how long each and every one took.
There's no time to see
Just how long ago and far away you are from me.
So open your eyes
And try to see through your darkest dreams.
Open your eyes
And try to feel around this open hell hole of a place.
Do you see it now?
Just how far I've gone away from my deepest fear.
Do you see me now? I'm standing on the edge, overlooking you're catastrophe.
Take it anymore.
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 0 2
True Potential of a Failure
He didn't know what they expected of him.
They constantly brought him down.
His dad was abusive.
And his mom didn't care.
He was a failure to them both.
But if only they could see him now…
And what he has become
He's soaring high, living his dreams,
And nothing can go wrong it seems
He's above it all...
And no one can stop him,
He's away from
The ones who didn't care.
His whole life he knew they were wrong.
He tried not to listen, but the screams kept going on.
He never believed them… he hated it all.
But never found a way out.
He couldn't leave them there…
He'll prove them wrong some day…
And just look at him now…
Can you notice him?
He's made it after all…
You never believed this day would come…
Do you see him now?
Or do you even care…
He's made it past all the comments you had to share!!!
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 0 5
She wrote me a letter.
And told me not to read it 'til I got home. So I did.
Thinking everything was ok.
But when I opened it, I nearly cried.
'cause it said:
Don't bother calling me.
I'm already gone.
Don't bother trying to change my mind.
I've thought it over,
And I'm leaving you…
So the next day,
I went to talk to her.
She didn't say a word.
She just turned her back away….
And called me later that night…
And then she said again…
Don't bother calling me.
I'm already gone.
Don't bother trying to change my mind.
I've thought it over,
And I'm leaving you…
I told you goodbye…
I didn't know what to do.
I was so in love with her…
But she just didn't seem to care.
I couldn't take it anymore…
So that night.. I left her a message saying:
I don't care anymore.
You're already gone.
I'm sorry that I wasted your time…
But I've thought it over..
And I'm over it…
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 1 13
We're All The Same
I'm so sick of being alone, cold and hungry.
I'm so sick of what is wrong and what is right.
I can't seem to think. My head is spinning,
I can't breathe.
Because we're all the same.
We all live, learn, and regret.
We're all the same.
We're all the same…
You see what's on the outside…
But not within.
You see what this cruel world has turned me into.
I'm a twisted wreck,
A freak of nature..
But I'm still a part of you!
Drum Solo
Can't you see I'm just a simple person?
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 0 0
Ash and Me :iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 0 5
When Death Takes Control
Sometimes people just don't think
Until the gun is loaded.
Dissolving every memory
As the trigger is slowly pulled.
Sometimes people just can't breathe
Until the air is lost.
Grasping every second chance
That everyone might have had.
Sometimes the ending only comes
When the beginning takes its toll.
Clearing away the thoughts of exising,
As the clock runs out of time.
But sometimes, on the other hand,
People become awake.
They finally see the beauty of Life...
When Death takes control...
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 1 22
It Will End
Sometimes we all just need to breathe,
Just once before we fall.....
Sometimes we just need to release it all
and let the pain be free
sometimes we need to scream, just once,
until our lungs collapse...
so grab the ending by the throat,
and let us all begin..
it could be now,
it can be then,
it may even be tomorrow.
but no matter when it happens,
we.. all... die...
in some way or another...
it will end...
it will end..
some people just don't undertstand...
how other people feel...
they just can't seem to accept
that others feel as well.
so why can't we just end it now,
and kill this humanity
becaue one thing is completely sure...
hold your breath until it's over..
hold your breath and let the time stop
hold your breath, and hear my voice...
i'll be the one to carry you to another day...
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 2 8
Here We Go Again...
Here we go again...
The pain exceeds all of my expectations.
Once again I find myself in a world of lost souls.
Where do I go from here?
I'm going blind...
The air is so dark with lies, I can't even see my reflection...
My twisted insides fall out on the floor,
And leave me to rot, alone and empty...
I'm going crazy...
My mind is escaping me, I have nothing left..
I can't believe in anyone...
Not even myself...
So what do I do with the rest of my life?
Do I just throw it away with the rest of me?
Where do I go on the path of betrayal?
I keep walking backwards, and enjoy it way too much...
These thoughts of death, of murder and deceit
All come to my minnd as I lose my blood through the fountain of death...
And I see myself alone and tired...
Lying awake on this cold, dry floor...
This is what it's like...
A view of my life...
Slowly preceding my death...
Falling... Falling... Deep into the black pits of suffering...
And here we go again...
:iconeverythinglost13:everythinglost13 2 10

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My fears are building up inside me,
My pleasures already gone,
I try to search for an exit
but I can't seem to find a door.
And so I sit here
in this windowless box.
Can anybody hear me scream?
Can anybody see me break?
I want to break free,
I want to run,
each day
I'm sending myself more insane.
I'm sick of the hurt,
I'm sick of the lies,
I'm sick of the guilt.
"How are you today?"
"I'm fine."
I'm not.
I want to smash your face in
purely because you're standing there.
I don't want anyone to be around me.
I'm sick of being asked how I'm feeling.
I'm even more sick of lying about it.
Look in the mirror
and smash my reflection.
I don't want to see it today.
Sick of what I'm seeing,
waiting for a change,
but a change of what?
A change of image?
      I can't afford surgery.
A change of environment?
      I'm not ready for a new house.
A change of attitude?
      Probably, but I can't
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BoBo :iconalexandercasteels:AlexanderCasteels 77 57
In the distance a child cries,
Run away from all the lies.
Death lays ahead for the silent soldier,
Dreadful events sure to occur.
Blood spreads red across the Earth,
Bodies buried in the cold damp dirt.
The indefinate scream as a man falls still,
He was killed against his will.
His soul is absorbed into sweet silent oblivion,
Will the sufferage of hearts ever end?
The men refrain as they see their friend at their feet,
Tears flow and their soul grows week.
They have succumbed to immolation,
This is the price they pay for such destruction.
:iconsacredtears13:sacredtears13 1 2
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I scream, I cry,
I don't know why.
All I know is it feels so good,
As I slide the blade and see the crimson red blood.
This ecstacy that I feel,
The blood lust seems so real.
All I want is to feel pain,
I cut my self over and over again and again.
The tears slowly slide down my cheeks,
As my body begins to grow weak.
Now that I've started I can't seem to stop,
I'm laying on the floor and can't get up.
The stained red clothe in my hand,
It was for you that I bled.
The stinging pain becomes unbearable,
Why did you have to be so deceitful?
I now look down at what I've done,
So ashamed of what I've become.
But now I guess I'll say goodbye,
As I cut even deeper with my knife.
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Alex Stewart
United States
Current Residence: A small room with a little bear and padded walls... I like it...
Favourite genre of music: Metal, Death Metal, Anyting I can mosh to... hehehe
Favourite photographer: Jean Francois
Favourite style of art: ... ummm...
Operating System: Huh???
MP3 player of choice: iPod
Shell of choice: Frog... THeY HAVE SHELLS IN MY MIND!!!!!!
Wallpaper of choice: Black... Or blood on white... or black..
Skin of choice: smooth, freckled
Favourite cartoon character: Superman
Personal Quote: "'Trying' is just a broken promise people make themselves EVERY DAY..."
Hey everyone... it's been a while since I've been on. I haven't had any time. I just posted a few poems, I hope you all like them. So... what's new you ask? a lot. Me and ashley split up about a month ago. It's been really hard, but I've been pushing through everything harder than ever. I'm in love again, so it's fine. But I'm not meant to be in love right now. I'm really not meant to have anyone there, so I'm taking the time to know myself,and depend on myself, instead of others. This year has been the hardest year I've ever encountered. However, no bad has come from it. I have learned soi many life lessoins this year, that I hoestly can't say I regret anything I have done. I'm, turning 18 in a week, and I'm pretty excited for that. hmmm.. let's see..... what else has happened since i last let the world know... um... I'm in another band. We're called Vital Malice, and we just played our first show last saturday. I'm completely addicted to shows now, so I'm tryign to get us some more shows... I'm the bassist. Well, i think my poems reflect how I truly feel right now, so you should read them! Um... yeah. Love is the fuel for my body, and I lvoe every person in my life right now. Especially Micaela and Tyler. You guys mean so much to me, you could never know. I'm so thankful for both of you. Y'all have stuck with me through thick and thin, and i thank yu for that. Thank you for showing me who I truly am, and thank you for loving me in a way that I have never felt. I could go on forever and a day talking about how much I love you guys, but I'm sure you're already tired of it.

So, I'm pretty sure that's about all I have to say right now. I'll try to keep the world updated with my life. I'm trying to get some of my poems published, so everyone should send me a not telling me which ones i should send in. I really don't know. Well, thanks for listening to my rambling! I love you all! God bless!

  • Listening to: When You Say You Love Me- Josh Groban


Add a Comment:
RawEm0tion Featured By Owner Feb 14, 2007
Someone left you some V-Day love! :love:

LesterXavierIII Featured By Owner Aug 13, 2006
Thanks for the fav!
everythinglost13 Featured By Owner Aug 15, 2006
no prob.. i liked it a lot
Steve555666 Featured By Owner May 5, 2006
Hey! Thanks for the Fav on "Broken Smile"!
everythinglost13 Featured By Owner May 6, 2006
no prob.. it's briliant!
Steve555666 Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2006
Hey! Thanks a lot for the Fav!
The-Mourning-After Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2006   Photographer
thanx for the watch :hug:
wilmes Featured By Owner Apr 1, 2006
thank you very much
JeanFrancois Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2006
Thanks again :)
plaidvampbat Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2006
Gah, my brain hurts...stupid head...

So thanks for the watch! You're poems are great.
Add a Comment: